Breaking Dawn – Part 2 concludes the Twilight Saga. Some thought that we would eventually get the fifth installment by now. For the movies, I guess it would be the sixth installment. After awhile, these films start to blur together for me. Anyways, this entry opens on Bella finally becoming a vampire and learning that a shirtless Native Wolf wants to bang her newborn. I included a clip of this discovery, as I know you people won’t watch the movie unless I entice you. Check that out above this review and we’ll move deeper.
It’s been 6 years since this movie came out and I still can’t get over the Werewolf bonding with the baby. Hell, the majority of this film is about what to do with a monster baby that wasn’t meant to exist. Look at that CG from the early part of this decade. Why does it look like a PS1 game that Werewolf Twink wants to sex up? The rest of the movie is Michael Sheen collecting a check with a bunch of characters actors deciding what to do with monster baby.
They eventually learn that other monster babies have existed and they are supposed to be cool with it. Meanwhile, random background lady keeps bringing up that if they all battle, key figures will die. But, they don’t even battle after mean lady reveals that she made a mistake.Notice that I’m not using character names because these people are barely characters. They are fancy fop GI Joe villains propped up to support a young woman’s supernatural marriage fantasy.
If there is anything you can take away from these movies, it’s how regressive they are when viewed on a completed timeline. We all know that one girl who was too scared to be Goth, but too wacked out to be normal. This is her fantasy about being daring, yet succumbing to the same role as every other woman in her life. The fact that this series made insane money is a testament to the mainstream audience’s inability to recognize anything new. These films are comfort food for the scared who when presented with the fantastic are forced to tailor them to reason.
This film series over the last 10 years has become the prophetic mirror held to a youth society that treasures Instagram, but won’t pick up anything that their friends aren’t already enjoying. I can’t wait to see how these movies hold up in another decade. See you then!